I can't believe this guy is actually arguing with me about this. I told him I refused to carry on a conversation while standing in the middle of the railroad tracks where I could not see if there was a train coming up behind me. I was getting pissed! I stepped back onto the tracks and said "fine then...I'll watch your back and you watch mine OK? Do you understand why I kept walking??? Just then I could feel a vibration in my left foot and shortly after heard the sound of a train barreling our way. It was coming from behind him. Even though it was quite a ways out I was getting tense. Then the sound of soft music slowly got louder and louder until it snapped me right out of my dream and signalled the time I had been waiting for for months. Time to grab the bags, grab the woman, grab the beef jerkey, grab the Mike & Ikes (thanks Grammy) and get ouselves on the road!
Just in case you were confused at what I just said there, my alarm is soft music, not the un-Godly beepng sound that MUST have been created from the bowels of Hell. Doesn't take much to wake me up, especially on road trip day.
It's cold outside, but not nearly as cold as I thought I had seen on the news. About 39 degrees. We got everything loaded up, taking extra care so as not to forget the sweets, and headed out at 3:20 a.m. for our first stop. Coffee, tea, and biscuits. We pulled into Burger King and was promptly told coffee would be another 15 minutes. Umm, no time for this crew to wait. Pull into McDonalds...not open. Say what? It's the day AFTER Christmas...come on people! So on down the highway to another McDonalds and sweet mercy they were open. We got our morning pick-me-up and, with smiles on our faces and fuel in our bellies, began to make our way to St. Louis, which is our jumping off point for Route 66. As we headed north the temperature kept dropping...finally bottoming out at 26 degrees. Through Mississippi We saw plenty of deer....however most of them appeared to have tied one on pretty good the night before. They were sleeping on side the road. Not very safe. Some appeared to be slammed....others were really hammered....one of them really needed to pull itself together. It was not a pretty site.
Memphis came and went and the flat, sparsely populated Arkansas plains greeted us with open arms. Its kinda like that smelly aunt that you really hate to hug (although I would not have first hand knowledge of a smelly aunt). You know it's inevitable that she will get her hug, just like it's inevitable that we have to drive through this so we just grin and bear it. Quick lunch at Wendy's and the welcomed hills of Missouri finally come into view. Texture to the land! Besides the dozens of hawks making quick meals of field mice that we saw along the way, we did see two unexpected sites. A coyote was competing for field mice withthe hawks and, perhaps the oddest sight of all (besides me making a duck face using a couple Pringles chips) was a camel walking alongside the interstate. I doubt if he was also competing for field mice but hey, who am I to judge. I have duck face Pringles and we are getting a kick out of it. There may be a picture somewhere....
Around 2:00 we roll into St. Louis. Denise had never seen the arch in person before so I decided to pass the exit I was going to take and just loop around through the city back down to our jumping off point for the Mother Road. As we traveled passed the arch I think we both realized the same thing....we had no idea how much wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood. We were also thinking that there was no way we were going to drive through town to go back south where we needed to go. That section of town made the ninth ward look like a Sandles resort. That was some BAD looking shit right there (sorry for the language Grammy). I felt to need to check my back pocket for my wallet even though I was going 60 mph down the interstate. Maybe I was jumping to conclusions, but have you seen National Lampoon's Vacation? I was afraid I would wind up with more than just "Honkey Lips" on the side of my truck. When I got off the interstate to merely turn around, a girl approached the side of my truck and also next to the car in front of me. Neither me nor the other driver looked up. From what I could see she was trying to sell something. I wasn't buying. And I double checked for my wallet to make sure she didn't pull some voodoo shit and teleport my wallet into the box she was holding (sorry again Grammy).
We made our way back to where we jumped on Route 66 and my awesome co-pilot read off the instructions on the guide. Turns out I have to give kudos to Missouri on marking the road. Since none of thr highways are actually designated as 66, they have posted signs leading the way. There was not much to see close to town, but things started getting more interesting as we went west. We ran across some old motels and gas stations...some of which required some strategic U-turns. I snapped a few pics and we thoroughly enjoyed our first little bit of the Mother Road. As the sun began to set...DIRECTLY in front of us...searing our eyeballs...thoughts were on where to eat and where to stay. Denise saw a sign thst said "voted best pizza in St. Louis". Knowing how much I love pizza, this seemed like a match made in heaven. Well...it was more like a match made in a small town in Columbia. We were dissapointed and couldn't help but think who...just who is the real Justin Beiber. And who the heck voted them best pizza? 3 people with the flu and the son in law of the owner? At any rate we left with full bellies and the knowledge that people around here have no idea what a good pizza tastes like.
Just down the road we found a nice Comfort in and decided to get comfortable...749 miles, 15 hours of driving, a headache, and lingering disappointment behind us. I sure was hoping that people around here have the same taste in comfort as we do, unlike their taste in pizza. Two thumbs up in the comfort department. Also two thumbs up for putting a hotel next to a convenience store that sells beer. We are partaking in said beer as I type this. Sitting in a comfortable bed...eagerly awaiting a full day of Mother Road adventures tomorrow. It's like Christmas again and again. Matter of fact every day with Denise is like Christmas. I'm so very blessed.
Time for bed...hopefully no more dreams where I'm getting pissed at someone (sorry Grammy...last time) and I double checked and I still have my wallet...although I feel like I was robbed of some money paying for pizza that tasted like shhhhhhhh....told ya I wouldn't do it again Grammy.
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